The Bible is sharper than any two-edged sword, but for Tennessee couple, Esther and Obadiah Lamentations take the Bible as a weapon to an entirely different level. One summer on a Sunday after church, Esther and “Obi” caught a robber stealing from their house. Within seconds, Esther suddenly remembered a joke about a God-fearing woman who told a burglar to stop, and she quoted a scripture reference: Acts 2:38″ while the burglar stopped, froze and ran out of the house. The woman called the police and told them what she did. He was caught by them down the road. The cop who arrested him said, “All the old lady did was say a scripture reference from the Bible.” ‘Scripture?’ replied the burglar. ‘I thought the lady had an axe and two 38’s!’

The only “weapon” Esther and Obi had in their hands were their own Bibles. She got so mad at the thief she took the Bible and smacked him in the face as hard as she could in the face while Obi turned him around and smacked him with his. Before they knew it, the thief was out cold.

News got out around the church about Esther using her bible to knock a criminal out. The Lamentations didn’t stop using Bibles to deter thieves. Esther told a local reporter: “We have Bibles of every size and type all around our home for one purpose: When we have criminals come into our home, we ‘book ’em. In other words, we hit ’em with our Bibles to knock them unconscious. It’s a Christian way of defending yourself with using a weapon that can kill, like guns, knives, and tasers.”

She continued, “I come from a long line of pastors. They preached the Gospel and slapped their Bible all the time in order to reach many people with the Gospel.”

The reporter looked stunned but asked Esther to show him their arsenal of Bibles.

Esther showed him many in three armoires staggered around their home. Esther said, “We’ve got King James, New King James, NIV, ESV. That’s about it really. We get them from the local Salvation Army, other thrift markets, and churches around here.”

The reporter tied up the conversation. “So, do you keep in shape to be able to knock a criminal out cold?”

“Yes, I’m thinking about inviting the public into our house. I would name it, ‘Bible Defense Class’. We would train you to hold the Bible in certain positions to best defend yourself.”

“Are you going to start that soon?” the reporter asked.

“Yes. It’s a whole new way to get to know God.”